MOOSE FINDS DARK DEN FOR SALE!!

Moose was lost in the vast abyss of SL.  She finally arrived at Dark Den to find it was for sale!   Here moose explains:

Ok, now don't worry none.   It were another Dark Den what wuz fur sale, yep!   Some how I woke up in this here place what said it were dark den but it wasn't our Dark Den  what has Lint in it, Nope!  It were another dark den.  Well I got my typist to take a pic so you could see me in this here other Dark Den so as to prove I wasn't high on no moonshine.

Now this is kinda spooky and I sure hope it ain't a omen of what is to cum later on. 

((SUPPORT DARK DEN OR WHEN YOU TP IN YOU MAY SEE SOMETHING LIKE BLOW:))

Tha Moose's First Day Back

Oh my where do we start!  If you follow sunshine's blog (Gera)  you know Moose had a day with the girls.  She took them on a ride that almost killed them all and met a girl who was bigger than moose, sunshine, and butterfly together! 

Now here are some shots of moose's new digs!  She finally has a nice place to sit and fish!  Moose seems to be in, well, moose heaven now.

This is the picture of Moose, Butterfly, Sunshine, and Maam (aka yazee) at Mama Allpa.  Oh and the huge woman with the blue poka dot dress?  She was very strange.  She claimed to have used magic when asked how she arrived.  She was also much larger than our moose.

Moose is naked in these pictures  because when she wrecked the buggy in the water her clothes got wet and she had to dry them.  Now yazee seems to think Moose should go nude at all times.  Should our moose be naked? Hmm.

Later Moose took sunshine back across the water, in a boat this time,  to Glint where she somehow got stuck on the milking machine!  Nobody knew how the milker worked so they had to wait until our Moose's breasts were drained and the machine stopped automatically.

Poor Moose! So humiliating to be milked in public like she was a cow! 

Sir io was there along with sunshine to witness as Moose was milked telling her story of times she was milked before and forced to moo as others watched and laughed at her.  That would never happen to our Moose in Glint!  Would it?

Later in the day Moose met what she called a grrbunny.  She called her a grrbunny because she looked like a girl but had a bunny tail and ears.  Now at first Moose thought she was a lost playboy bunny but quickly found the girls bunny ears to be real and her breasts were clearly too small to be a playboy bunny!    The bunny kept trying to get Moose to eat grass but Moose never could figure out what she wanted.

Her friend sabi convinced our Moose to take part in a prank on her Master Chy.   Here is Moose and the girls with Master Chy in the pool.  Note that the master is fully clothed and sleepwalking.  ((afk))  No one is safe!

Later in the day after running away from an angry Master Chy.  Moose meditates.  My our Moose must be tired!  I am sure she will sleep like a baby tonite! 

Moose Continues Her Quest For Glint

Moose has her things together once more and searches for alternate transportation to Glint.  She hears that the space shuttle is soon to launch and she investigates:

"Well now wonder if this here shuttle stops at Glint?  Now lets see how I ken get in this thing ta stowe away."

Moose searches the shuttle for a door.  Finding the door she jiggles the lock to see if it is open.

"Darn tha luck its locked.  Well i reckon they aint gonna land anywhere Glint nor Gor so I best figure out another way.  Oh!, Oh!  An arrow plane!  Yep!  Now they is sure ta be sum arrow port around here sum where?"

Moose searches for an airport and finds one.  She looks at the planes  ("arrow planes" as she calls them):

"Well lookey here!  Here is them arrow planes what I wuz lookin fur.  Now wonder if any of them is gonna go to Glint or Gor?  Hmm, they is no buddy round here so I gonna just look ta see what they is ta see!  "

Moose searches the airport:

"Look at tha planes they got!  Now these here look kinda complicated ta fly around in fur sure but maybe I ken stowe away on one of these here and get closer ta Glint."

Moose's eyes brighten as she sees another plane.  This is a smaller plane.  What is Moose thinking?

"Now this here plane is more my size.  Now flyin aint much different frum drivin a car I dont reckon.  I mean you go left and right stop and go in a car.  You do all that in a plane too.  Emm, but you also go up and down and all around.  Well the up part aint so bad its tha comming down in one piece that is the hard part.  Hmm, what if i got me one of them parachutes?   Yep!  I ken just fly around till I see Glint then just bail out!  Ok now, let me look at them controls.  Wow they got stick shift on this here plane."

Moose climbs in the plane as she wants to get to Glint.  She looks over the controls and looks at all the labels but as we recall reading is not one of tha Moose's strong points.  She manages to start the plane,  and since it is lined up on the runway already, she takes off up up into the air as if she were an ace pilot!  If Moose is afraid, she is not showing it as she seems excited and happy until it hits her!  The ground is WAY down there!

"Whee! I is flyin a arrow plane!  Wow look at me flyin.  Oh my god! im up in tha air! What tha hell was I thinking?"

Moose calms down and learns the stick shift she found is actually how she can go up and down and the extra gass pedals are how she goes left to right.  She is supprised as the plane appears to just lfy itself.  Her feet just rest on the pedals and the stick moves her hand.  Hmm.  Still apprehensive, our Moose begins to navigate by the sun headed south east toward teh bermuda triangle.

"Emm, well this ain't so hard!  Nope!  I is figurin this out just fine.  Now I know all I gotta do is ta fly over Glint and just bail out.  They didnt want this here old plane anyway I dont reckon.  Well maybe Ill pay em fur it one day if I get sum money.  Wonder how much one of these here arrow planes costs?"

Moose had already secured a stout parachute and has it strapped on..  She is determined to get back to Glint and is willing to jump our of a perfectly good airplane to get there! 

Moose goes lower to get her bearings and sees what she thinks may be Glint!  She flys over and sees Glint!  Yes she has arrived.  Well not exactly, she is 3000 feet up.  There does not appear to be a landing strip but Moose wouldnt know how to land anyway so she prepares to jump from the plane as it flys over Glint. 

Moose takes a deep breath, closes her eyes, and JUMPS!

Moose is screaming as she falls from the plane.  Oddly, the plane banks to the left and appears to be returning from where it came.  Could it have been remotely controlled?  Oh! a puff of smoke in the cockpit of the plane then Marie Leveau appears!  Did Marie use her magic to help our Moose.  Hmm, that would explain why our Moose, made it to Glint as our Moose is a sweetheart, but  is not exactly an ace navigator.

Moose falls faster and faster until the reaches terminal velocity.  It will soon be time to pull the parachute cord.  Moose has been counting to 10 for the last five minutes because she can't figure out what comes after 3.  Now our Moose knows nothing of parachuting so only has the one chute so lets hope it works!  Ok the cord pulls itself and the parachute opens.  Way to go Marie!

YES!  IT WORKED!

Moose is in the air just over Glint.  You can see the ship with horns in the harbor!  Amazing!  Moose seems to have made it back!

Moose is excited but still scared as she approaches the roof of the Glint Courthouse.   Almost as if she had a clue she pulls the ropes and navigates the parachute over glint.  Or were they pullinjg her arms?  Hmm.

Amazing!  Here Moose lands right at the Glint gate and greets those present.  She is exhausted and cannot talk because she is breathing heavily from the plane ride and skydive.  She excuses herself and heads toward the location of her buggy. 

Moose is supprised to see her shipping container home and garage intact with her buggy located near her friend sunshine's house.  That is not where she left them.  Hmm, Marie again?   Moose sits and takes a breather.  

Opps!  Moose is wearing shoes.  Hope she remembers the no shoe law!

THA MOOSE IS BACK!

Moose Begins Her Journey Back To Glint

Moose hears that there are chores and "civil duties" to perform in Glint.  She packs for Glint but she needs some sort of transportation.

Here is Moose, still in BBWorld:

"Emm, Here i is at the junk yard what they got over here at tha bbworld.  Well, they got sum nice junk here.  Oh! tha reason I is here?  Well thats easy cuz i is here lookin fur lumber what I can build me a raft with.  Yep!  I is going back to Glint as soon as i get ma raft built and fasten a sail to her."

Moose finds materials for her raft.  Here is Moose as she is putting the raft in the water:

"Oh ma raft is done and i is about ta set sail.  Now I figure if I ken get ta gor from here I might be able to stowe away on that boat Sir Hammer is using ta get back and to frum Glint.  Any buddy know which direction Gor is in?"

Moose sits in the raft, waves, and sets sail but will she ever be able to find Glint again?

Moose sails for what seems a long time and she arrives at an island.  Tired and hungry, our moose secures her raft and gets out looking for food.  Now what Moose does not realize is she got off at a place called "help island"

Moose speaks:

"This here island dont look nothing like Glint!  Wonder where i is at?  Well i gonna just look ma self around and see what they is ta see"

"Well this is different.  Look at this here snapshot what I took?  Well its got this big round thing what sum buddy wuz draggin around tha island.  This here place is populated by people what they call new bees.  Not sure exactly where these here new bees is frum?  But they sure is doin sum funny things."

Moose continues her exploration and makes another discovery.  Very excited Moose speaks about it:

"Lookie at what I found!  I found me a free house!  Yep!  See tha sign what says free house?  Now tha problem is they aint room on ma raft fur this house so how is I gonna get it over yonder to Glint?  Reckon it floats?  Oh well, I guess I best be gettin sum vittles, supplies, snoozin, then be on ma way at day break.

Moose buys supplies, has a meal, then is on her way again sailing away in her raft the next morning.  She again travels for some time but there is trouble.  Our moose runs on the rocks and her raft sinks.  Moose, shaken up, is safe but soaked head to toe. 

"Oh my!  Ma raft is sank!  I is gonna have ta save what I ken and see if they is a place what has the stuff i is needin ta fix this here raft.  Well, emm, I guess I is spendin tha night here at this place what they call fearly.  Kinda gives me a spooky feelin staying in a place called fear but  its just a name right?

Moose drags her raft out of the water and up to a nearby beach house.  Our moose walks up to the door and knocks.

"Emm, Is any buddy home?  I is Moose and I is kinda shipwrecked here.  Ken sum buddy help me fix up ma raft so I ken be on ma way?  Oh and even better if ya could tell me how ta get to this place what they call Glint"

Are the homeowners home?  Will they help our Moose?

Moose Explores BBWorld

Our Moose has started to explore bbworld.  She found a rodeo!  Now here is our Moose riding a bull.  She did quite well in the rodeo setting new records!

Moose has met some new people at bbw.  In case you are not familiar with the term bbw, it means big beautiful women.   Moose also tried some dancing on the pole at a near by biker bar.  I suppose the seated gentleman was entertained however he seems rather quiet and not looking at our Moose's performance.

Lets see what Moose has to say about her adventures in her own words:

"Emm, this here road e oh is kinda fun."  laughs "Fortunately ma butt is well padded fur when i get bucked off this here bull tha shock of landin aint so bad.  Now mind tha horns though if you ever think of ridin one of these here bulls cuz they is kinda sharp and pointy lookin."

"I got ta dance on a powl?  Yep!  I got ta powl dance at this here bar what they call a biker bar but you know sum thin?  They weren't bike one nowhere!  Now I did seen this guy wut might be a biker but he didnt got no bike and i think them bikers wear leather jackets or sum thin?  Well he didnt have no jacket at all."

"They got a dance club too what i went to but they werent friendly like the folks back at Glint wuz."

Moose sighs.

Meanwhile back at Glint, Marie Laveau arrives to explore.   Are there other witches at Glint?  Marie arrives disguised as a "world traveler".  She has weapons similar to the others at Glint but she also has a large and dangerous arsenel of magic.

Moose Makes Another Home In Glint

Emm, well how dee its me Moose?

Well I got me another place to stay now.  They got these shipping containers what they dont use because of the embarko?  Well I got me one and found some wood and sum crates and stuff and made me a nice little home over here behind tha beer dillo.  Yep!

And OH! I is helping out tha owner of tha castle what took tha place of ma spooky house.  Turns out its non other then Vi and her master.  They is gonna fix it up real nice.  They is really nice folks and is letting z build a place near by. 

I got me a bed and stove and even a nice desk ta write on.  They is a sittin place and well it aint as big as tha spooky house but its home fur now.  I am getting hungry and i am thinking of sum rabbit stew.  In fact they is a rabbit right there!  Hmm, If y'all will excuse me?  I gotta go rabbit huntin.

This Here Is A Test Ta Find If You Is Ready Fur Tha Retirement Home

Retiree Bathtub Test

During a visit to tha doctor, this here ladee asked , "How do you determine whether or not a retiree should be put in an old age home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the retiree and ask him or her to empty the bathtub"
"Oh, I understand," tha ladee said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

So if you wuz thinkin either tha spoon, tha teacup, or tha bucket and not tha plug then you might be ready fur tha rockin chair at tha old folks home. 

Now I thought just getting out of tha tub and turning it over would be tha best way cuz thats tha way we did it back home when we had our yearly bath out back.   I ain't ready fur no rocker, nope! 
I is off my rocker fur now.

Now y'all be good till next time. 

((Credits: I took this from an email and modified it for moose, it isnt original but the author of the original version is not known))

New Gate at Tha Dark Den Entrance

How Dee!  Its me!  Moose?
Well I just wanted to let ya know they got this gate over to tha Dark Den what has lectricity in it.  Yep.   If you ain't care full  you ken get zapped and knocked kleen on ya assets. 
What I wanted ta tell ya is they did away with them narrow gates what was always zapping me.  Emm, don't know if ya noticed but i'm a little wider than the other's here and that combined with lag led ta me gettin zapped more than my share of times.
So now the gate is nice and wide fur us full size girls ta get through.  Well all I ken say is thanks to Miss Ladee Maam fur considering us what is a bit wider than others by putting in a wider gate up front.

Playin Pool Over To Tha New Security Place

Well how dee again its me, moose?
Emm, I went over to tha security place again ta show ya tha swell pool table they got.  Now ta answer ya question fore you ask it yes ma boobs do get in tha way a little.
Ok here ya go with me playin a game of 8 ball.  One thing they could use is a bar wtth this here pool table cuz well ya need a bar with a pool table ya know.

I guess having a bar where they got tha courthouse is not all that common but this here is Glint and anything ken happen here!

Yep all they need now is a bar and sum of them wall mounted beds what  they got over to tha beer dillo.  OH!  now thats an idea!  They should get one of these here pool tables over to tha beer dillo!  Yep!  Well i gotta go now but more later as i do some more snoopin.  Bye fur now.

Can I be Honest With You?

In Second Life Moose has heard these words more than a few times.  Another player will be talking then they will say "Can I be ?"  No duh!  Weren't you being honest before?  One shouldn't need to ask if they can be honest.  Why would anyone ask that question?  Why do so many ask it?  OK YES YOU CAN BE HONEST!  You have tha moose's permission!  You have my permission!  In fact when you ask the question, "can i be honest?", one would assume you were being dishonest up to that point, and would resume being dishonest after you were being honest,  for the moment you asked permission.  What that says is you are inherently a liar incapable of being honest without asking permission. or........
Perhaps it isnt permission they seek but they actually want to know if they can be honest.  That is are they capable of being honest.   or...
Many feel they must say what the other wants to hear.  Today one must be politically correct in their speaking or they are could violate some written or unwritten terms of service or hurt someone's feelings.  It seems someone's feelings would be hurt if you lie to them.
Moose ponders on these things then scratches her chins, grabs a chocolate bar, and says, with her mouth full, "PEOPLE IS JUST PLAIN NUTS" 

She goes on:  "Now ya take ole Honest Abraham Lincoln?  Now he wuz honest  He kept the USA together when it wuz flyin apart and he got rewarded with a bullet in tha brain.  So much fur honesty is tha best policy!  Poor Abe should have asked if he could be honest first!  Well I rekon it didn't occur ta ole  Abe ta ask cuz he didnt know no other way but to tell it like it is.  Hmm, ya know, they could sure use Abe now, but he couldnt get elected to no office in Washington nor no where else cuz he wouldn't lie.  Aint that one of them catch 2 plus 2s? or is it catch 4?  or maybe catch 22?"


"Insanity is relative. It depends on who has who locked in what cage."



--Ray Bradbury

Moose Makes a Political Statement

This is tha seat of power here at Glint.  The presidente sits here and does all tha governin.  Now one thing you ken say is that here at Glint our government aint fur sale to no buddy. 

Now other countries is different.  They is some countries what let money influence they decisions.  I mean them what have tha money buy the politicians.  Ken you imagine such a place?

Would hate ta think what would happen if they got rich people here at Glint what make tha decisions making the government nothing more than baffoons and puppets at they command.  Well glad that aint happening here!  Nope Glint aint fur sale!

Now other countries?  Well not so sure!

http://www.waxingamerica.com/2007/08/united-states-f.html

Wall Mounted Beds Over To Tha Administration Building

Here I is inside tha offices over to tha Administration Building.  They work so hard and got such long hours they gotta sleep standing up?  Well as i showed ya the wall mounted beds work well for them what has problems tossin and turning at nite.  As you ken see here they is a wall mounted bed like them what is over to tha spooky house where I live now.  Guess them beds is also good fur those what is on they feet all the time so when they give out they wont fall down on tha floor and hurt they selves.

**moose pauses and ponders on what she just said then sees that the building is empty**

Funny how no buddy is here on a work day.  Well maybe not so funny cuz seems they is other countrys what do tha same!  I went ta Washington DC once?  Well fur them what dont know Washington DC is tha capitol of tha United States of America?  Well they got this building where these senators and such they meet ta pass laws and stuff?  Well they dont seem to be there on workdays either.  Now they must be doin sum thin over there in the USA capitol building cuz they sure spend a lotta money!  Oh its ok though cuz they just print more dont ya see?  Oh and of course they seem to be able to get together ta give themselves a raise in salary on a regular basis too.  Yep thats governemt in action fur ya.  Hmm or is that emm government inaction?
Oh and they dont have no wall mounted beds over yonder in the USA capitol neither but its ok cuz the senators and congressmen find places ta sleep nites.  Now, fur some of them,  where they sleep nites is a whole other story! 
Well come back n see me and emm if you happen ta have a boat or plane or sum vehicle what ken get off this here island emm well I would really like ta visit with ya.

The Moose Solution to Whiners

Well how dee there Its me, Moose?  I got sum things I wanna get off ma chest about things whats goin on in Glint these days.  They is people what is refusin to take they punishment!  Now I ken understand folks stickin to they principles and I admire em fur it.  They is people who will simply not submitt under no circumstances.  These folks will not bend so they has to  be dealt with another way.  A way what will resolve they problem once and fur all.

The solution is ta simply snuff em out.  If they dont wanna chain on they wrist and ankle they ken trade it fur a noose around they neck.  Now here shown below is a nice gallows.  I ken build a similar one with the materials available in Glint.  All they gotta do is give me tha go and we will have teh ultimate solution to disobedient folk here in our peaceful law biding community. 

Now we aint gonna hang no buddy till they get they fair trial of course.  But after that formality is out of tha way and they dont wanna be no boi nor no girl nor chained to no powl  and auctioned off, they just get that rope!  Dont't ya see?  Solves everything cuz the folks what dont wanna submitt dont have to they just simply die.

Now here is an example of tha gallows I ken build. 
Six nooses NO WAITING!
I call em MOOSE'S NOOSES!

Now the actual structure may vary from this here picture depending on how much materials I ken get but we ken have as many nooses as we need ta get things back in order here in our peaceful little country what is based on peace and fairness and such.  Not sure if we ken have a roof like this one, but it would be nice fur them what is gonna die to have a little shade while they do they final dance on tha rope.
Course they gonna have plenty of seats so the good folks at Glint ken witness tha wheels of justice as they roll over them what whine.
((disclaimer:  This article is for entertainment purposes only.  It would be assumed "kill" would be temporary as with the practice in other sl gorean sims))

Ma Civil Duties

One of ma civil duties is ta do cavity searches on tha prisoners they chain over to tha gatherin spot.  They got two powls there and will chain up any buddy what breaks tha law.  They is punished by being used by any and all what happen by for sensual pleasures.  Now occasionally we get sum nice folk what just got caught doin tha wrong thing at tha wrong time but we also got sum bad folks what refuse ta obey tha rules even when they is chained to tha powl.
I try to tell folks that when you is chained to a powl is no time to be making threats and calling people names and such.  What they should do is keep they mouth shut till they get off tha powl before they start to mouthing off.  Now you would think that would be common sense wouldnt ya?  Well  in Glint?  Hell I think its illegal to have common sense.

Moose Exclusive: Mama Allpa Store Discovered Near Glint!

Not far yonder on tha other side of the Glint fence you ken find this Mama Allpa store.  It is surrounded by a pretty park like atmosphere and a fancy mountain lodge fur some privacy, ta get tha process started,  if you know what I mean?

They also have a Mama Allpa clinic here and a baby furniture store.  This here is a one stop shop fur havin a baby from the fun and games that get the having a baby started,  to the birthing, and then to  tha diaper changes and burpin.

Dont't know what they gonna call this place but its here now as you ken see.  In the top picture i am standin on this here bridge leadin up to the Mama Allpa store and the other picture shows me standing in front of tha Mama Allpa clinic they got near tha store.

Fully Recovered Moose Now Continues Her Tour of Glint

Emm, well its nice to be back on ma feet again after my recoverin from tha wounds i got from tha back shootin varmint.  I am now continuing with a tour of Glint.  In this tour I show ya parts of Glint they dont show ya on tha regular tours.  No no!  I show you the inside of Glint.  The under belly of Glint.  Yep!

Now here we is at the Glint Administration Building.  Here they got the office of the presidente.  Out side they office they got a balcony with a nice view of glint.  Now they is some other stuff they might just not want ya to know about.  What am i talkin about?  Well Im talking about a trunk full of cash money!  Yep thats what I talking  about.  Just looky here what Im gonna show ya.

Now here is a nice view of Glint from tha balcony outside of the presidente's office.  This gives you a good view of tha square and you ken almost see tha gatherin spot if they wasn't them houses in tha way.
This was taken on a pretty day as you ken see without a cloud in  tha sky.

But look at what ole Moose found inside one of them rooms over to tha Administration building?  Why a trunk full of money Here I am sittin beside it as you ken see.

Now funny thing is they got at least two safes in this here building but didn't put none of this here money in one of em.  NO! They got this trunk of cash just sittin her pretty as ya please WIDE open and unguarded!
Well needless ta say I didn't touch none of that cash cuz I don't wanna get in trouble; but they better lock this stuff up and hide it from them bush whackers what shot me cuz they ain't got no respect fur nobody.  Nope them low life scum bags would take all this loot fur themselves.  Hehe good thing ole Moose got all that pirate treasure,  from that ship over yonder,  hidden!  No buddy gonna find where ole Moose put that there gold, nope, no buddy.

Moose Thanks Everyone For their Get Well Cards She Recovers From the Vicious Attack

Moose shot in the ass by coward.
Moose says:
"Well thanks fur tha cards and letters.  Emm Im recoverin slowly.  We will get back to lookin around to see what to see after my wounds heal"
Brave Moose Removes the arrows from her ample ass and is laying on her bed at the spooky house. 

Resorceful Moose finds ice.  Not sure how she was able to find the block of ice or how she managed to get it in position but it is working, along with the pain pills to relieve the pain.   Poor Moose was just trying to do her "civil duty"